Sunday, January 17, 2021

Career now, relationship later

How many of you women have at least once thought or still think men are supposed to be the breadwinners? Well ladies, get that out your head. Women are on the rise as the family breadwinner, according to the New York Times.

“Women are not only more likely to be the primary caregivers in a family. Increasingly, they are primary breadwinners, too,” Catherine Rampbell writes for the NYT. Since the 1960’s, the percentage of households with children under the age of 18 that include a mother who is either the sole or primary earner of her family has quadrupled.

With women being the breadwinners, this can create a pattern for future daughters. Seeing their mother be independent can influence generations of women breadwinners. If we teach our daughters to be focused and to never give up whatever they put their mind to it can start the pattern.

We can teach our daughters the seven B’s: books before boys because boys bring babies. Now, this is not to bash the male species, but considering that out of about 12 million single parent families with children under the age of 18, more than 80 percent were headed by single mothers, according to 2016 U.S. Census Bureau.

Of course, everyone’s situation as to why they are a single parent is different, but if there were no boys to distract you, there would be no babies just yet. Women should have the urge to want to succeed and be the best version of themselves. Think about males when you get to where you want to be in life.

Women are bringing home the bacon and cooking it too. When you make your own money and pay your own bills, you feel good about yourself. It proves to you that you can do things on your own and with your own money. You can be independent. You do not need a male figure to take care of you.

Men have even left their woman because she makes more money than them. Instead of trying to collaborate, they let their pride get the best of them. Resulting in them leaving. According to, “Money management is still a role men pride themselves on,” says Seattle sociologist Pepper Schwartz, co-author of The Surprising Secrets of Happy Couples.

Women may feel discouraged but never forget what Queen Bey said, “always stay gracious best revenge is your paper.” The more a woman contributes to the family income, the more likely she is to take the lead in both everyday money matters and long-term financial planning. also states, “It’s not just the women who say so. Husbands in a survey who didn’t earn as much as their wives were far less likely to say they were the primary decision-maker, although they remained a lot more involved than wives who earn less or no salary in nearly all areas.”

It is clear that while men usually feel ownership in the family’s finances no matter how much they earn, women often need to be making a direct and significant monetary contribution before they feel the same.

Collect your money and disregard males. Don’t let anyone male or female get in the way of a better you. Do the best that you can for yourself before you worry about anyone else. Would you rather be heartbroken and crying in a Bentley or on the bus?

Email Tamiyha Carter at

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